What Fairy Tale?

Fairy tales are myths. Happily Ever After’s are as uncertain as the vote Sarah Palin will receive from her mother in law. That is just the painful reality of love.
I’ve been living with my boyfriend for quite a while now. It was a decision that hurt a lot of people in our lives (but that’s a whole different story). There are days of exhilarating happiness, of natural high, and moments when confusion is strapping, it binds you in pain.
A few days ago, Brad was talking to a mutual friend on the phone. After we said our hi’s and hello’s she mentioned how different Brad and I are although we are both water signs (Scorpio and Cancer). Whether I believe in the interpretation of stars or not, the truth in her remark astounded me. This wasn’t the first time I’ve heard it but it was surprisingly the first time my thoughts swiveled … was her comment just based on astrology or was it because she knew us in various periods of our lives? It’s true both Brad and I enjoy the outdoors and revere the thrill of new adventures (among others) but there are a lot of things we say or do that raises an eyebrow and some that gets our blood churning.
He could make himself laugh when I could find the same comment completely insulting. We could be wrapped in a sweet snuggle at the same time he decides to pass gas. He is amazingly comfortable and great at entertaining big crowds while I have to seek for familiar faces in a small room. At times I wonder if our unlike personalities would clash and leave us in pieces.

When we have days where we struggle to adjust or accept differences, I often ask someone what ever happened to happily ever after. Once a wonderful friend, Vince, said “oh sweetie, it doesn’t exist.” It was like watching the beginning of Shrek when it starts off with the traditional opening 'Once upon a time...' and is then cut off when Shrek says 'What a load of...' (for the record, I thought that was hilarious).
Albeit that painful reality, my heart continues to skip when I hear his car pull in the parking lot or when I get a random call that begins with “I just had to tell you first.” I still love the comfort of having him in the next room or falling asleep on the sofa watching a movie (especially without the flatulence) and of course the lilies that make an ordinary day special.
I don't envy those who live in blissful ignorance, waiting for their fairytale to happen, not anymore. I’ve already accepted that my life won’t be filled with dragons, witches, damsels in distress, or a pineapple under the sea, that’s what Disney World is for. Although I will continue to believe that once in a while in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a taste of magic.

A Fairy Tale

This is the fairy tale that should have been read to us when we were little:

Once upon a time in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said: ' Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so. ' That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself: I don't think so.

"Would've saved us a lot of heartaches" - Forgetten

Wolf's Honor!

In the land of make believe anything can happen! My kids (for non teachers, my students) love magical-mystical happenings with uncanny characters and cruel villains. Growing up, I remember the mean step-mother in Cinderella, the three bears who scared Goldilocks away and the Big Bad Wolf who huffed and puffed and blew the piggy’s house down. But lately, authors have started a series of ‘the other side of the fairy tale’. One class favorite is the The real story of The Three Little Pigs.

According to the wolf he doesn’t know how this whole Big Bad Wolf thing got started and explains “maybe it's because of our diet. Hey it’s not my fault wolves eat cute little animals like bunnies and sheep and pigs. That's just the way we are. If cheeseburgers were cute, folks would probably think you were big and bad, too.”

We also remember that he huffed and puffed to blow the pigs' houses down, it turns out that he simply had a bad cold and had a powerful sneeze. Who could blame him for eating the pigs that died when their houses fell as a result of his sneezing? “It seemed like a shame to leave a perfectly good ham dinner lying there in the straw. So I ate it up. Think of it as a big cheeseburger just lying there.”

He continues to explain that he was only visiting the pigs to borrow a cup of sugar to make a cake for his deal old granny's birthday. The pigs wouldn't even give him any sugar! When the third pig insulted his grandmother, he got a little crazy. The police found him trying to break down the pig's door, “The rest, as they say, is history. The news reporters found out about the two pigs I had for dinner. They figured a sick guy going to borrow a cup of sugar didn't sound very exciting. So they jazzed up the story with all that "huff and puff" and "blow your house down" stuff.”

After we read the story, I asked my kids whether or not they were convinced by the wolf's version of the story. One of my boys answered “Yes, because I like to eat pigs and cheeseburgers too.”